My relationship with my boyfriend has been the best thing that has ever happened to me. :( I too wait for my baby !! Men know that if they directly tell a woman to lose weight it’ll cause problems or destroy their wife’s self-esteem. This poem really touched me. There is a program called the innocence program. And I am 46 years old. To answer your question though, yes, there are many unhappily married couples who stay together. *(and of course, you’re welcome to write more here* For the complimentary consultation session, you can go here to schedule: https://lastingloveconnection.com/contact/. He is always downing me about one thing or another, saying I’m lazy or yelling about the smallest of things, like if I forget something. :-( (completely unrelated). Why do we bear the burden, don’t we deserve better looking men? They took my husband on November 18, 2016. If you care to discuss our situations, feel free to email me at 1bonchesva2@gmail.com. A distant man will make any wife feel hurt. Now in 2021, he insists, he wants to continue our marriage ( another 6 yrs in abstinence) and resume a normal marriage. My heart drops. 20 yard heart shot, he ran 100 yards and dropped. My cousin was in county jail and he told me he had a friend for me. Before I moved we talked and texted every morning and every night. But after COVID lock down started last year, he initiate sex less and less, sometime he didnt wanna kiss me because fear of spreading the virus…I complaint about kiss, then he start to kiss me like normal again. Some of these comments are so shallow. He is the other half of myself that I never knew was missing; he is my soulmate and I will love him until the day that I die. I talked to him and he said he feels fine and he is happy, it’s not something he really thinks about. It may be daily, twice a week, once a week, or once a month. He met with lawyers, and they want $31,500 up front and said he has a good case and they want it. I cook, clean, give him cuddles, listen, make an errort with his family and friends (they speak to me more than they do him). I want my life back and I want my family to be back together again. I find a lot of hope and insight from hearing of other women who are holding it down out here as well. Perhaps more. He goes to court Monday for offer/sentencing. I am still full of a lot of anger, disbelief, and a whole lot of WHYs. weve been married 18 years. This man Weiner was going to ruin me. Made me lose weight and feel inadequate. I never met anyone like him. Venison pastrami from last years doe. Then he totally changed and was sweet and would visit me at work, bring me food want to have lunch with me, want to go on walks with me, just be around me. He supports me emotionally in every way and makes sure with every call he begins with "How are you?" Men only understand ACTION. He said “I don’t know you would get upset” ever since that I didn’t want him following onlyfans girls or watching Twitter girls videos or looking at their photos. Letting him know I am still filing for divorce. Hi there, everyone. This is so very touching! As per your desire to transition away from marriage. Why does my husband prefer his hand over me? I read your poem and cried. one fine morning when I confusing asked if he could explain to me why he seemed so distan h e told me he no longer felt chemistry with me. He claims he “found” the motel key, I have informed him that I can find a motel key too and no I won’t be sitting alone on my birthday next weekend. I hope she waits for me if the worst happens. My husband was very attracted to me and used to make love to me with his eyes before we would make love while we were dating.. We dated 3 or 4 years before we got married and did everything right. We’ve been together for 3 and a half years. Others in your life will come and go, He has made no secret that he prefers women with straight hair, which is fine. The DA needed me to get some kind of time because it was election year and he needed to add more to his list of convictions. The name means 'made by God.' I quite like it’s natural colour. Coming from a girl that has had her heart destroyed as well. Karen— so happy you posted this. Which makes me feels completely ashamed he is doing it. Recently we had a huge fight and I had him arrested and retained an attorney, to file for divorce. Try getting a sex toy and maybe your husband’s vouyeristic tendencies will take over. Jean Smart says the sudden death of husband Richard Gilliland has changed her life in every way. We got into a relationship in 2011. I think that our marriage is over. Sleeps so close to the edge of the bed, as if it would kill him if he touched me. I kinda trust he won’t do it, but I am so confused and insecured of why he is even with me if he dont find me attractive anymore. The gawking, the ridiculous smiles, the standing over me at my desk, the looking at my chest as I was talking, and then, gravity who was not my friend. Had he married any of these “desirable” women, they would be in the same position as you. Kim – thank you for this clear share! Wow, these are true words. You could be getting the best stories in your inbox twice a day. Wow I just spent a very long amount of time reading through all of these yesterday. Thank you to those who shared their stories. He makes me feel so insignificant. I feel the same way like you do, feel unattractive, unwanted, no matter what I do its not enough for him, so on..I hate it. Just didn’t realize it before 3 years of marriage . We are great friends now and I am remarried and he is engaged. I found this poem and it made me cry. This is quite typical in the first few years. I love my wife but constantly think that I wish she took better care of herself. I dont do this for vanity, I do it because I want to take care of myself and find it helps with my mental health in a pretty stressful job. Venison pastrami from last years doe. Posted by 8 hours ago. It’s a tough place you’re in. :( We have a beautiful little girl together. I know it’s not the same, but maybe he’ll realize he needs to pay attention. It’s so bad that I feel like leaving. I am curious when you told him you felt extremely insecure, what did he say? He doesn't want for anything at all. Sometimes, really hard. Sometimes it all falls apart at once and everything is the worst. And then something great happens! And that should fix it, right? This book is about why the answer to that question is . . . well . . . complicated. Only time will tell. Still today, he takes extra care of our kids by making them their meals, getting them ready for school and being the Chaperone in field trips, he leaves me post it notes all around the house to tell me he’s sorry and that he’s so disgusted by his behaviors – he now only drinks with me, he has no social media – I am in control of our social media – we make posts together, he shows me he loves me by keeping the house clean and makes coffee every freakin’ morning, does laundry, makes all of the grocery runs and buys me all of my favorite yogurts, cheeses, chocolates, ice cream, and all of the ingredients I need, and even candle wax melts and epsom salt for all of my baths – it was really over whelming at first but also realizing how much he really didn’t give a shit about me!! I have to find the good in this or else I'll drive myself crazy. Life was great; we were so in love. At times it felt all but inescapable. Bering survived. And in addition to relief, the fading of his suicidal thoughts brought curiosity. Where had they come from? Would they return? Is the suicidal impulse found in other animals? Don’t know what to do anymore! For better or for worse, sickness and health, but he is not attracted to my 50lbs heavier body. Whenever I am in the mood to make love I will go over to that room when we finish I will return with the kids. Asahel (Hebrew: עשהאל ‎, Ancient Greek: ‘Ασαέλ, Latin Asael) was the youngest son of Zeruiah. But I can’t put back what cancer took away, even with pretty nighties. He was sentenced 4 years for not showing up to see his probation officer. 5 years later, she has gone from a size 8 to now a size 14 going 16. I feel your pain. He is the best thing that has ever happened to me, and now I have to live without him. I am wondering if anyone has advise for me;18 months ago I told my husband of 30 years that I want to seperate, that I do not want sxx anymore. He won’t let me talk about how I feel. I’m always the one making the first move. I mean I’ve gained 40 lbs over the last 5 years but I’m not fat. I have gained his trust, honesty, and sincerity, but I'm also worried it's jail talk. I know I have to leave him at one point and the point is he sleep with someone else. It just hurts so much that he’d rather be intimate with himself instead of me. He ran into Dick Russell, a JFK researcher, in the Middle East in 1971 and told him, Mme. Where are the actions though? God made me for him. I am so hurt, and I really can't do anything to help him. 9 a I am speaking the truth in Christ—I am not lying; my conscience bears me witness in the Holy Spirit— 2 that I have great sorrow and unceasing anguish in my heart. Now turn this around for a moment. Right after we got married it all stopped. Its toxic. I love reading poems like this because it uplifts me and helps me realize that I'm not the only one going through this. In 2018 i really wanted to get a divorce, but he promised if we stay together everything would be back to normal which isn’t now. If he loved me he would prove it to me during this year apart. Since the quarantine we both have gained weight due to the gyms being closed. No, I will get myself checked out lol. Please say a prayer for us, and I will be praying for all of you. I am 53, he’s 54. I love this guy. We are appealing but even that takes time. And whether we ourselves are ill or not, we can learn these vital arts from Bernhard's generous wisdom in How to Be Sick. If it really matters make some time to find someone like a trained coach or counselor to speak with. We set up guidelines on our computers that I know he follows, so porn is no longer in the house, but he tells me he has no interest in any sex at all or even viewing it. It made me cry; I loved it. As the wife you aren’t one of the guys, you’re more. Come soon and make our house a home. Thank you so much for the respond. He was shocked as well when he knew i looked up to his phone. You aren't here to comfort me, Most of the time he is encouraging me more than I am him. We finish each other's sentences. It's very hard at first but once you're able to go visit and spend 6 hrs with him face to face it's very nice but hard to leave him. Sorry to say this but your bf sounds like an emotionally abusive & manipulative jerk. Some couples touch more, others less, but whatever you’re used to – when it changes in a dramatic way it takes a toll on the connection. He spends a lot of the time gaming and talking with his online friends (guys). There were so many feelings during the grief process that seemed to come out of nowhere. Your quote here: “I needed to take charge of my own happiness with or without him,” is quite powerful. I was so miserable and sad with him knowing and feeling unwanted that it was just destroying my.persona and that was not healthy. Keep your head up it's gonna go quickly for you and don't worry about haters if you have any. Originally doctors said smoking was fine. I almost want to slap him when he pecks. He has shared 2 ejaculations with me in almost a year of intimacy. I love him more than I thought possible. I really regret trying connect with him in this way. That is a beautiful poem. Hi Marcella- My love has 2 years left on a 5 in the federal pen. Peace and Love my fellow travelers. My fiancé is facing 18 years as well. Jesus did not say, denies Me in their heart or denies me in their mind; He said, denies Me before men. No harm in trying, there is something to trying new things and that we all must change in some ways to make our marriage better – but if those changes aren’t something you like or don’t feel good to you – no sense in doing them for a sustained period of time. How is the fun, play, time together, connection? It saddens me that he is no longer excited with my body. He was sentenced to 10 years in 2013. Our relationship grew through emails, letters and phone calls as he is in prison over 400 miles from our home. Go find one of them! My ex-husband of 20 years wanted me to not bother or touch him and he had a voracious porn addiction. He tells me he can’t understand the medical staff because he can’t hear them due to the noise. Kate died with him. I'm jealous of Kate. I wish I could be her. This is a book of short stories about Kate and Katie and their trauma. It’s always about looks only. He is everything I never knew I always wanted, but I can't have him right now. I will pray for you, your husband, and your children, as I know what you are going through! God bless. “I point out actresses, celebrities, and women on the streets who have the look I like.”, “I tell her how attractive I thought she was when we first met.”. FOR 2 YEARS he has chosen the drugs and the porn out in my shed INSTEAD OF ME EVERY SINGLE DAY. DA can't show any evidence, but yet my husband is still in jail. 50 is the new 30 . We have been together since 2012 he has been locked up since June of 2013. He slipped up once and said he didn’t have a porn problem before we got together. Things took a shift on our 4th year together. My guess is, you and your partner have layers of things going on. 50 University St, Seattle, WA 98101 | Tel. We talk every day and write letters, but I can't wait to feel your hands on me. Please don't let people put thoughts in your head about what's best for you. “I love you”. Are they pigs as well? I only ever had 1 other boyfriend. You light up my life every time you call. I’m 46 and my husband just turned 40. Mrs. Creeves, Far Away Lover By So we dont have sex anymore. Therefore, why bother if a men rejects you just because you are a human and therefore don’t look the same you used to. I told him after the first year that if he wanted to stay with me I needed to see changes in him. I left it at that. My husband always says to me anything that’s worth having is worth the wait. I wish you the best. It broke my heart to see him like that because he has always been so active and so animated despite being already 70 years of age. hes easily 100 to 150 lbs over weight but im supposed to starve myself to be thinner for him.it hurts a lot. The kids sleep with me in our room and my husband sleep in the kids room by himself. I prefer my hair when it’s straight as well because it’s much easier to manage but I work full-time sometimes 10 hour days so I don’t often have the time to do it. Your husband and you are married and suddenly like almost all people things cool down in the bedroom a bit, and instead of working toward keeping that flame alive by actively communicating and being honest and open with each-other, you the woman decide to secretly go out and seek what you are missing in the relationship; affirmation, attention, whatever it is. Please do not tell me that I, as a human being, an animal, a caveman, am expected to have the same sexual arousal for her as when we first started dating and that I now need some professional councillor to brainwash me into telling me what I do or don’t like. Their sex doesnt meet the fantasy you watch or think about in your secret life = wham, not the reality you have made normal anymore in your mind about what sex and intimacy is. The more a man distances himself from working on the relationship, the more he’s possibly not interested in making things work. I also, have been abusive back. The other man complaining that his wife isn’t thin enough, sure he says she isn’t trying but I am not sure that’s it. My husband of 12 years likes watching porn even before we got married. My neighbor Angela she showed interest in my boyfriend many times and my father he went to call her to come in our house. You may enjoy that interview. “Matt was really worried because the boy withdrew into himself and couldn’t say a word for two days. It's heartfelt. My husband and I have Dex 2-4 times a year. My husband and I have been married for 14 years and we have hit an all time low in our marriage. I told him it would take time and we needed to be spending time together, that he was “grieving” if you will from the loss of his affair. I married my husband on October 5, 2015. The only solution is to begin communicating. My first buck taken with a bow. HEARD. I'm praying God keeps us all strong and faithful, especially from the judgment from our family and friends. He will be coming home soon, but it does hurt like hell missing and been without him, but he sees me every two weeks and he's good, so I know how you ladies are feeling about all your men friends. I understand completely. And then this obsession with dressing up got worst he was buying all these outfits and bras and panties and high heels. Reading it makes me wonder our next stage of life. For those of us who are "seasoned", I just want to say that love comes at all ages. I’m so sad. After a few dates he told me he loved me I asked why and told him I needed to know him more to say it back. There are a lot of shapes and sizes people prefer. Dear Abby: People are shunning me because of what my husband told them You can email Amy Dickinson at askamy@amydickinson.com or send … Xxoo ♥️ A stranger-friend who has felt a similar pain ♥️♥️, My boyfriend and I been together for over 7 years. Women believe that men react to let’s have sex as we instantly get aroused this is a joke. But somehow, when she woke up again, she ended up somewhere otherworldly. It's rough and I lost my way for a bit but I'm glad I turned to god and I will stand by him until the day I'm back in his arms. We have twins that are just 1 year old, and he is my everything and it's going to be hard for me. Thank you for your comment. I’d hate for you to go all out with diets, botox…and find out that doesn’t solve the root problem (which it won’t). I don’t want to fall ill, but if my husband responds the way that your husband did, gosh, maybe I should get really sick! I sent this poem to him to maybe help him a little. I do it for myself, but I also do it for her, because I assume she’d like to be married to someone who closely resembles who she met and fell in love with. All other content on this website is Copyright © 2006 - 2021 FFP Inc. All rights reserved. He went back to jail because that messed him up. He makes my day turn around, and I try go see him every other day. All I hurt for is him to come home, and he went in on a five year deal. It’s very painful and difficult to imagine that turning 47, having 50 plus hot flashes a day, choosing to love myself and let my gray hair come in, and then, thank you loss of estrogen, gaining about 15 lb, have all truly changed the way I look and change the way I look at myself. I thought things would get better after he got help, but now I am seriously thinking of leaving the relationship, as it just never seems to get better. I am 38 years and he is 41 years old.He don’t hug or kisses me anymore except when we making out which is whenever we both in good moods and not mad at each other he hardly speak when we do … Best of luck. Stupid ones at that. He showed me that for a men the quality of a women (personality, health) doesn’t matter.I asked him once when I found out that he masturbated looking at photos of a women we new. we had twins 2 years ago and im struggling to lose the last 25 or so pounds. For many, this is the most difficult thing of all – and is usually difficult because of a fear of man, the exact thing Jesus warned against in His previous words (Luke 12:4-7). However, l have so much insecurities. Now divorced, she and her husband happily co … I am also very sorry to hear this is happening (and has been happening) in your marriage. I do not trust what he now says that he does feel a desire to be intimate- yeh right now after a total of 18 years. Although this could be a sign something is wrong, it doesn’t mean he’s not attracted to you. I get hit on by everyone but my husband. What about the looks of men, nobody in this comments section has mentioned how their partner looks or she wants her partner to change the way he looks or dresses. Mrs. Allen. In my heart I can, but in reality I don't know because it is a long time before he is going to come home. Started off as a pen pal and turned into me proposing to him. It floats down and curls at my feet, or so I imagine, because I cannot look down to follow its descent. She then referred to an incident in December 2020 when she called police and locked her husband in the conservatory to protect herself before he smashed his way out and allegedly assaulted her. He is 10 years younger than I am, but I don't care. This type of treatment from someone you really love destroys us on every level. My husband and I have been married for 5 years and we have two beautiful and adorable kids. Given the science on arousal, it could be a variety of things going on with your husband. I am a producer at CNN. Wants to do life with me. This is a hell of a journey, but he loves and adores my children and myself. I Hate My Husband – Does My Marriage Stand a Chance? When couples first date, it’s like they only exist for each other. It breaks my heart that in the end I only amounted to a pair of boobs to him. By the way... this poem really touched my heart. Quite often, couples find their relationship changes immensely after marriage. But its not his first time to be cold and distant with me. What in the world could be the problem? It sounds like he really loves you, and is a sweet invested man. Second point; is it now your spouses responsibility to morph himself into this new version of what you want in your marriage? I just want to know if it’s actually over so I can stop holding on to hope & just move on start a new life. But now, I dont care anymore as long as he gave me the sex.. but he just turns me down a lot of time.. and i was confuse and sad.. maybe he’s just not really attracted to me anymore. I told him l do not need a roommate. However, he no longer tells me he loves me. I suffered from rejection during a long term relationship when I was younger. I have asked him about this, but it always ends up in us fighting. While their focus was there, the sessions helped us see that the couple had grown apart in some ways, that each partner hadn’t felt alive in life, or had something else that they didn’t connect to sexual attraction (but once they talked about it, shared, and discovered the other issues) they started to feel more alive in every area. He has given me a gift, to want, see and expect more from my next lover/partner/friend. We are getting married when he gets home. It floats down and curls at my feet, or so I imagine, because I cannot look down to follow its descent. Our house is never quiet. I left him. We both used to be very into fitness but not much now. I pray you are happy where you're at today, and may the rest of your days be never set apart again. I guess I’ll just have to wait for the next time.Is it possible for a man to love and say he only wants yu and nobody else but not get hard? Most tend to be in their 40s and 50s, as that tends to be an age when couples are more open to counseling (and have the resources). If your partner won’t do coaching, that’s fine I do 1-1 sessions. Great poem! When I bring it up – he just gets mad and storms out without talking about it. I promised myself never to let myself go thru that again even if I had to walk away from the person that I loved to the moon and back because saying good bye is a part of life and eventually we learn to love and be happy again. And do not interrupt me in my course. I'm so glad I found this poem to send him, and knowing I'm not the only one who is going through this terrible situation makes me feel like I'm not alone. Those men never loved you. Just like most men he loved big breasts. He watches porn with nothing but super skinny girls witch I am not.. and it really hurts me what do I do? My husband likes when I preform sexual favors for him, but doesn’t seem to want full blown intercourse a lot anymore. yes, it’s great our partner loves us for who we are, but it’s also great that we are willing to grow and transform to make our relationship happier and better. Your partner clearly wants something, doesn’t know how to talk about it, and not talking hurts you both. Thank you! And we just went into our corners.”. I want so share my life with my beautiful, fun best friend but I dont want us to be stuck in a marriage where we are both craving outside of the marriage for this need to be met. Lastly, is it normal for your husband to you DUDE every freaking time? Lately he can’t reach orgasms and this has never been an issue. In a broken marriage couples don’t have fun together, don’t spend much quality time as a couple, and feel distant. I’ve been with my boyfriend for about 5yrs now. I did so because before that just as your article said he hardly tried to touch me. I'm in shocked badly. I've been dealing with this right now, except the future is up in the air. Clinton went on to post a huge electoral vote loss to Trump. I begged him to just sleep in the same bed with me all those nights I fell asleep alone feeling physically ill from lack of touch, tried being sexual and watching it too with him, no wonder he practically fell asleep on pathetic little old me when he was doing all that. I met a man a couple of months before he got locked up and we both fell in love with each other. Just keep those beautiful caring thoughts. "He was a great dad, and he made me laugh every day," … He said i was lucky because he didnt literally cheat, he just did some adrenaline rush. We stay in contact through letters and phone calls when he can call and I can put money on his account. But afterward, they want to run. A cold and distant partner makes it hard to connect. It’s a common stereotype that after sex men distance and roll over like beached whales. My man is in a state prison as well. 123. I think everybody comes around. Most of her time is spent sitting and looking at her smartphone. Never thought someone had a similar story like me! Asahel was the nephew of King David, as well as the younger brother of both Joab, David's general, and of Abishai.Asahel is mentioned in 2 Samuel Chapters 2 and 3.. Additionally, the name Asahel (under a variant spelling) appears in Aramaic in the Book of Enoch. He was only 56 and died very suddenly. One day you will wake up and know exactly what to do. I am not a prude in any sense.